March Calendar of Events

Yes, I know it’s already the 7th of March.  Damn month has been so busy I’ve only been able to get around to the calendar of events now.  First off, I should note that March has been a busy month for my immune system, who is clearly a slacker as I’ve been suffering the damage that every germ I encounter can lay on me.  This is Little One’s first year in “real school”, so he’s been bringing home every microscopic critter that invades his classroom.  He’s generous with his critters, too.  Teen and I have been going through so many tissues I would advise you all purchase stock in Kleenex.  Oh, and there’s been puke as well, I shouldn’t leave that out.

See, that’s why I haven’t been writing too much, or reading for that matter.  I’m busy.  And the rest of the month isn’t looking too hot for the written word either.  Here’s a rundown:

March 7 (today!) – Today is the dreaded half day.  A day invented by some evil goon in an school board administrative office.  In my county, the high school’s half day means a late start rather than an early dismissal.  So after I drop off Little One, make breakfast for Teen (they don’t serve lunch at the high school on half days), take Teen to school, and throw in approximately 3/4 of a load of laundry I have to turn around and pick up Little One.  There’s no “me” time in a half day, and no actual education from what I’ve heard.

March 8 – I’m getting my hair cut.  I had to switch hairdressers so I’m either going to get butchered or look fabulous.  If I get butchered maybe I’ll get a blog post out of it.  Now you may be asking yourself why I had to switch hairdressers.  Or not.  It’s quite possible you don’t really care about this.  It’s a funny/awkward story, though, so you’re going to hear about it.  The last time I got my haircut was just prior to my surgery.  I’d been going to this particular hairdresser for quite awhile and I really liked her.  That night I was explaining the whole saga about my tumor and the headache I had endured trying to get my insurance company to cover my MRI, when she spit out, “Yeah, but if you were black you would have gotten it for free”.  Um, hold the phone sister, what the hell did you just say?  Since we were mid-cut I let it slide and made an internal promise to myself that, as soon as I could walk again, my main goal in life would be to find a less racist hairdresser.  Keep your fingers crossed that I don’t go to tomorrow’s appt. and the girl is in a Klan robe.

March 9-10 – This is birthday weekend with my sister.  My birthday isn’t until the 19th, but we are going to celebrate on this particular weekend.  We shall eat copious amounts of food, drink too much coffee, and window shop until we drop.   It’s become our birthday tradition.

March 12 – My annual 42 pt. lady bit inspection, if you know what I mean.  I’m certain this appointment will include getting chastised for not doing it last year.  And that will set the wheels in motion for my yearly mammogram (that I also skipped last year).  Hey, get off my back, I had a tumor to deal with…..months after I was supposed to have done all that.

March 13 – Follow up with my surgeon.  Hopefully all will be well and we will admire his arrow straight incision yet again.  Then he’ll pat me on the head and he’ll say, “See you in June for the first of your many MRIs”.  At least that’s how I’m envisioning it in my head.  That man better not find anything else wrong with me.  I’m still trying to figure out how I’m going to pay my hospital bill from the surgery.

March 17 – Duh, St.  Patty’s day.  I’m an Irish girl.  That day is sacred, yo.

March 19 – Guess who turns Four-Tay today!

March 21-22 – This is where I reckon I’ll go to the clink for squirrel slaughter.  Many of my neighbors have taken to feeding them and now every time I open my door there is at least one or two of those fluffy tailed rats sitting there patiently waiting for me to throw them a peanut.  Only, I’m not going to, see?  And I’m really getting sick of having to shoo squirrels from my stoop.  Although, if I do end up in the clink over it, then I’ll be exempt from the worst thing I have to do this month.

March 25 – Freakin’ JURY DUTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know…..civic duty….blah, blah, blah.  I’m going to do it and I’m not going to weasel out of it by saying I’m the member of a gang or it’s against my religion to judge anyone’s guilt or innocence.  I’m going to buck up, and do it, but I’m not going to like it.  And so help me if I get on some sort of Jodi Arias “I killed my boyfriend in self defense even though the evidence overwhelmingly, irrefutably says otherwise” kind of trial, I am seriously going to be annoyed.  But, I’m still going to do it.

So, in other words, I guess I’ll see you in April.